Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize