are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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