Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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