Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
