i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
