we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize