I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
