Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I need a burrito and a hug.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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