Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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