i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
