My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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