also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
