You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
