People in love make me want to vomit
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
