how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm at about main and main street
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
