Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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