just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize