I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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