I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I can't put those talents on a resume
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
