I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize