I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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