bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
