i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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