Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
