# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
