All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
