You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
