Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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