Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Randomize
