He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
