just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
