real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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