wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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