There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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