What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize