I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
