So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
