He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize