barbara walters just said penis...
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
