oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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