Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"

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(818): View more from California

don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.

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(845): View more from New York

no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.

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(+55): View more from

Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.

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(716): View more from New York

When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."

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(206): View more from Washington

Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.

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(281): View more from Texas

Dinner?

(713): View more from Texas

YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!

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(515): View more from Iowa

I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.

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(573): View more from Missouri

my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.

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