forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
so let's talk penis.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
