yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
