He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Found your dick twin last night
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize