Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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