Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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