Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
