she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
