He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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