sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
